Tag Archive: Ti


You no more than road under my wings

Yet more than every minute spent

Battling over dreams never dreamed

Men never loved

Thoughts and actions never put to fruition

Theater words made for tragedies and stories of woe

Far away in the decades

I spent learning

we are not mirrors

but black holes made to devour

and waiting to implode

You still more than every length I walked.

Annunci

I like to drive for long hours.

Alone.

There’s freedom in the curves and bumps of the road.

I don’t mind driving in the rain as long as it is not near hurricane strength. The chevrolet darling can take well even flooded streets and windshields stay clear under buckets of water.

She (she, not it) is a big american well made elephant and gives me a ton of security (and horsepower ! 😅)

I love to drive her in the night as I put in high wattage lamps for the long headlights.

And – following some much needed advice – with some help I finally had precision wheel camber made on her.

It’s already a few months actually and man if she runs now, no need for extra throttle anywhere, sometimes she’s almost scary downhill and uphill the acceleration is just out of this world.😅

Even the autonomy has improved to the point I see the change in the odometer.

I’m in love with my car and I’ve gotta a feel for my automobile (sorry for the word plagiarism Taylor darling! 😘)

Thing is Ti hates her.

Truly hates her.

With a passion.

All of her awesome wholeness and horsepower.

We had discussions over her.

Not very friendly discussions a couple of times (mainly when the gas pump broke and the year before the ignition coil just left me stranded in the middle of nowhere up a fucking hill).

But I’m not budging.

Chevy darling is my big baby and he can walk on foot for all I care.

Or take one of his damned trains (we’ve had discussions about them yes!)

I never liked trains, I always thought of them as dangerous steeltraps, secured to not very secured supports.

Sometimes when I know his train just arrived at destination I text him on purpose or I watch for delays on the news…

I’m scared shitless by trains for you are seated with no control over it and I never had much faith in people in general.

But you cannot ignore the engine gaining force, the wind cut by her shape starting an aerodynamical vortex, the high speed steering control disabled to better feel the curve (this is quite dangerous, don’t try it if you don’t know what you’re doing!!!).

I have faith in controllable machines.

I have faith in the Chevrolet darling maybe more than I should.

Cars don’t talk back they’re just four wheeled friends now
When I’m holding your wheel
All I hear is your gear
When I’m cruisin’ in overdrive
Don’t have to listen to no run of the mill talk jive

 

Whirlwind you are, shaking my old leaves

I watch you through the day, silent.

in the early mornings, while you still sleep.

I watch you and think many thoughts, more or less difficult.

I watch you when you drive us away to someplace else in this little holiday taken.

I don’t think I’ll ever tire out.

Colours extravagant and the sharp perfume of lavender.

The cadence of your voice in another tongue.

Earth blood red, diffusing its colour to light brown.

But the sky is down under my feet, the height of my waist.

Blue lavender, as far as I can see.

A sky made of flowers that sways in the evening as the sun leaves us in the shade and the perfume gets sharper.

Ecco fiori per voi:
lavanda fragrante, menta, santoreggia, maggiorana,
il fiorrancio, che va a letto col sole
e con lui s’alza, piangendo: questi son fiori
di mezza estate, e io penso che si diano
a uomini di mezza età.
(William Shakespeare)

We all need a little beauty in life…

This is my fifth one (the big one, little is a gift for a couple that just married)…counting the ones Ti has at his flat also mine…. Me VERY obsessed 😁

 

Blue hydrangea

cold cash divine

Cashmere cologne

and white sunshine…

LDR

You know, when I see one I always think about my Grandma’s.

Enormous flowers bigger than a man’s head, bushes tall as a full wall…

I always wondered if you could build mazes with them…

Still so blue…so intrinsically beautiful! ❤

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Sabato sera.

Calmo e non così caldo.

Grilli nel grano e luce obliqua.

Silenzi di campagna.

Strade sterrate in mezzo a campi di lavanda.

Mano nella mano per un weekend dopo parecchio.

Missed you, Ti.

4540

La MTB è in riparazione…deo gracias…e a quanto pare si è fatta meno male della sottoscritta! 😝
Io invece corro come una matta sulla chevrolet darling alla non ci fosse un domani.
Gli affari bisogna prenderli al volo! 😎
Peccato che se si lavora quasi 20 ore al giorno bisogna anche fare i conti con il frigo vuoto e la lavatrice prima o poi…
Questa settimana sono sopravvissuta a latte, biscotti e saikebon notturni e il ciclo malato inizia a vedersi sigh!
Ho sonno…tanto che oggi mi sono coricata 10 minuti alla scrivania ed invece erano passate 2 ore a ronfare….😅
E vabbè dai prima o poi le acque si calmeranno un po’ e potrò godermi un 72 ore di ‘morte cybernetica’ anch’io senza troppi rimorsi…💤🌴🍹🥰

MTB fracassata grazie ad una portiera apertami praticamente in faccia.
Ero ai 20 all’ora verso i 25 in accelerazione.
Immaginate la botta e come si sente la mia spalla destra…giuro che sono più incazzata per la mia povera bici.

Fracassata!

Tastiera del portatile che non risponde più nemmeno in hard reset.
Desktop che fa freeze nei momenti più impensati (quando ho bisogno di salvare la grafica appena finita, ovvio!)
Chevrolet darling senza benzina…

Questo è il succo della mia settimana precedente…poi chiedetemi perché ho un piede di porco.

Ti stamattina mi ha lanciato un’occhiata fugace ed è scappato dalla mia aura come se avessi un drago pronto a sputare fuoco.
Altro che Daenerys…

tumblr_inline_mq3e38dgwq1qz4rgp

4477

We have our idiosyncrasies.
Sometimes I truly hate him, so much I want to tackle him and his fucking heavy-lifting frame with my 50 kilograms.
Other days he makes me purr, no-one’s ever done it before.
I could live wrapped around him like a tiny monkey, my arms around his neck and my face in his back…a living backpack.
Better place to sit on his lap and err…well…
I adore him when he drives delicately my chevrolet darling, when he lends me his shirts to use as pajamas (even his defeated look when this happens), his wardrobe, the quality of the morning light through his kitchen window, his cooking, the rings of smoke he blows when he’s thinking hard.
The smile when he understands he’s winning big, the way he goes for it like there’ll be no tomorrow.
How he walks in after we have a fight, totally aplomb.

Ti is still him.
I am still me.
We just walk side by side down the same road.
Happy & Glorious.

Fin.

pexels-photo-908629.jpeg

Photo by Ale Usama on Pexels.com

4440

I hear the creaks.

Something is breaking.

Or maybe we are just stretching the kinks out of our bones.

I guess I like more the second thought.

For the first time now I’m thinking the thing between us is not going to work anymore, Ti.

You want more than what I’m trying to give you.

You want 200%.

Not only my work, my mortal coil or my mind.

You want all of it, the words out of my mouth, the words I promised my freshly adult self of twelve years ago I will never utter to anyone anywhere anytime for the rest of my sorry assed life.

I don’t like to be owned, Ti.

You asked one damned question some weeks ago – the one you shouldn’t ask – and all I heard were links rattling on a chain.

If you keep pushing this on me I’ll bolt like a hare.

The hard part is knowing you’re actually convinced this is the right way.

The correct way.

The only way.

In other words fuck Nietzsche.

4412

Oggi.

Fra nebbie e nervoso e calca.

Ressa e semi-silenzio.

Telefonate non volute ed anche alcune che ho desiderato ma sono divenute sabbie mobili.

Gente che non capisce la parola ‘impegnata’…Povero Ti!

Ed io che inforco la bici e vado.

Sí vado per non litigare e si salvi chi può.

Poi il ritorno, ore in auto.

Altro silenzio.

Io che mi dirigo in cucina pronta a prosciugare mezzo litro di tè e quindi una bella doccia.

E nella cucina ci ritrovo Ti, seduto su una delle seggiole in paziente attesa, non dovrebbe nemmeno esserci secondo la sua agenda.

Un’occhiata mi basta.

A lui no.

No.

No.

Ci sono domande che non si fanno.

Non così.

Soprattutto non a me. Mai a me.

Don’t do it, just don’t.

Life is already a bitch.

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